Sermon given by Taffy Jervey, August 13, 2023.

In Mary Oliver’s poem “The Journey” she illustrates the demands, voices and storms surrounding all of us. We all have these voices from family, friends, bosses, coworkers giving advice and making demands on us.  We also have our own voice rehashing things from our past that we cannot change; or our voice planning or worrying about future events that may or may not ever happen.  We all have running to do lists ever present.  

Mary Oliver also mentions the need for us to save the only life that we can save – our own.  It is when you can push all of the voices and worry and storm away that you can hear the one voice that can really help you and give you needed answers.  Some say this is our internal voice, some say it is the voice of the soul, others think it is the divine but no matter what you think or want to call it, it is the one voice that really matters.  But we often can’t hear it.  Why?  As Prasad Mahes says “The mind is like water. When it’s turbulent, it’s difficult to see. When it’s calm, everything becomes clear.”

How often have you come up with a solution to a problem while in the shower or in a hot bath?   I think the hot water lets us relax and be present, setting aside our worries.  We calm the turbulence in our minds which opens the path to solutions.   This same thing happens whenever we can calm our minds in other ways too.

So how do we do this?   

Some people think that the best way to calm your mind is through meditation so what is meditation?   The Oxford Dictionary defines meditation as the practice of thinking deeply in silence, especially for religious reasons or in order to make your mind calm    I can think deeply in silence about my to do list or about something I am worried about so that definition does not reassure me.   So I looked at  the Cambridge dictionary  which says meditation is “the act of giving your attention to only one thing, either as a religious activity or as a way of becoming calm and relaxed.”

I then looked up calm in the Cambridge dictionary and it says “peaceful, quiet and without worry.”  

This is what I want, quiet and without worry so I can hear my inner voice. 

So how do we get there?  

Some people find that sitting on the floor with your legs in a pretzel position chanting a mantra is the way for them.  While this works for millions of people around the world, personally when I tried it, I spent my whole time thinking deeply about how uncomfortable I was.

And as Justin Michael Williams says in his book “Stay Woke a meditation guide for the rest of us”, it is not comfortable for everyone to repeat a mantra in a language they do not understand.

What have I found comfortable for calming my mind?

I follow the many teachers that say to get in a comfortable position which may be sitting upright or may be sitting in a recliner or on occasion lying down.   Some say it is ok to fall asleep and that does help calm the mind, but it is hard to hear your inner voice when you are asleep, so it depends on what you really need at the moment.  And falling asleep may be your inner voice or your body telling you that sleep is what you need most.

So, you sit in a comfortable position and try to focus your mind on only one thing.  Some use a mantra to focus on and some just focus on their breath.  Everyone has other thoughts that come in, so you let them pass by and do not get absorbed in them.  

Meditation works well sometimes, but they call it a practice for a reason.  It does take practice to get into it and it is most effective to do practice regularly.

Personally, I like to use Justin Michael Williams recommendation to create your own mantra.  You can choose whatever you want, and you may find you need to try out different ones and you may use different ones at different times.   Some that I have used are Peace and love.  

He suggests that you repeat the mantra to begin but then you just sit focusing on your breath and when your mind wanders, as it will, then you repeat the mantra to get your mind focused again.   When I am successful with my meditation, I do get a calmer mind and I can often hear my inner voice giving me guidance – especially if I have put out an intent in my meditation to gain some help.   Sometimes I start my meditation asking for guidance and I can often get it.  

Sometimes, my mind is so active that I am sure that this type of meditation will not be effective.  An alternative is to do a guided meditation.  There are many online that you can find and there are even applications for your phone or other devices.

So, what if you have tried and do not like it or just the thought of meditation makes you squirm.  I have been there!  

When I was working far too many hours with way more things on my schedule than I could do, I thought, I don’t have time for this.  Sometimes I would sit in meetings with my boss, very stressed and apparently holding my breath and she would say “Taffy, take a deep breath”.  

I decided I needed to get into some stress relievers, so I tried meditation.   I sat and thought about what time I was wasting and how many things I should be doing. I just could not get into it so that was not working, and my stress was growing.

I tried some breathing techniques and a gratitude journal.   Both were helpful, but I still let my schedule control me instead of me controlling my schedule and my mind.

Eventually I tried piano lessons as a stress reducer.  It took time out of my schedule, but it was a meditation that I could get absorbed in.  Later I took art classes and that has been a great meditation practice for me.

 I was pretty slow to realize that the more I took time to do things that focus my mind on one thing and clear it of the clutter, the more I could hear my inner voice and the easier it made my life.  And to be honest, it is a lesson that I need to keep repeating or practicing!   It is so easy when you have a cluttered mind to forget that slowing it down will bring more solutions and ease your day.  

These don’t appeal to everyone so let’s explore some other options.

The definition says, “the act of giving your attention to only one thing,” 

That gives us a lot of leeway when it comes to meditation.  

I mentioned piano and painting in my search.  Any of the arts, whether painting, drawing, playing an instrument, singing or dancing can all alter your state of mind and calm it.  For those that think you have no talents (everyone has talents), try adult coloring books, Zen doodle or journaling.  When Joanie (my late wife) was having chemo treatments, I would often pull out an adult coloring book just to help calm my mind.  We liked coloring as little kids, and it is still calming as adults. 

Many of these techniques are used with patients to calm their agitated brains.  I have seen them used successfully for autistic kids and Alzheimer’s patients.

Our young kids are likely smarter than we are when it comes to clearing their minds.   They get angry and go off to do something on their own – color, play in the dirt, lie in the grass and look at the clouds, look out the window at the night sky, play with the animals, build things.    Many more and then they come back as if nothing ever happened.  Problem seemingly gone. 

As adults we can do these also, a lot of people love to play in the dirt – we just call it gardening, but it can be an all-consuming meditation.  How many of us still look to the skies to see the clouds or the stars.  We take our pets for walks and play with them.   We can make a walk into a meditation by focusing our minds on the present moment and what we are seeing and hearing.  Wood working, sewing, cooking, sitting at the beach and so many other activities that you can give your- attention to.  The key is finding activities that interest you or you love to do.  Another key is to stop reading about the processes and start doing them.  

These are all great stress reducers that help calm the mind, but sometimes you may not have time for them. So, what do you do...

As Thich Naht Hanh says, anything can be a meditation if we are in the present moment and wash the dishes when we wash the dishes and drink the tea when we drink tea.   

Just like pro athletes are taught – stay in the moment and do not worry about next play or the last mistake.  Athletes, musicians, artists and other high performing people who are truly successful stay present and get “in the zone”.   We can do this with our tasks also.  Take one task from your to do list and do it with your full attention.

If you can do this, you can also get in the zone which will help you. 
reduce your task list,
do a better job on the task, 
and give your brain a break from the clutter. 

It also helps you get through your task list faster because you spend more time doing it and less time worrying about it

You may also find you get guidance from your inner voice when your mind is less cluttered.  You can make a meditation out of just about anything.  If I recall correctly, Frank mentioned making snow shoveling into a meditation practice in one of his services. 

In the times when you need something very quick and easy to calm your mind, like when you are agitated with someone, Eckhart Tolle says, “One conscious breath in and out is a meditation.”   How many of us have needed that to calm us so we do not say something we will regret!   Just one or sometimes a few conscious breaths can make an enormous difference in our state of mind.  

Taking this back to Mary Oliver, you need to clear the turbulence so you can hear the one voice that can save you.   What is your practice?   Are you really doing a meditation without realizing it or naming it?   What things could you try to calm your mind so you can hear your inner voice?  

Blessed be and may peace be with you.